Anonymous asked: Recently I was given a sum of money as a birthday gift, which is very rare. Not a lot, just enough to buy my close friends small Christmas gifts. This would be the first time in a couple of years that I could afford to do this because of my financial situation. These people have always been kind enough to pay my way when we go out and have always worked hard to make sure I didn't feel like "the poor one" of our friends. But, of course, there is a much, much larger part of me that wants to use the money for myself. Like I mentioned, the economic downfall has really affected my family, and the idea of buying myself something nice is driving me to distraction. In fact, I've spent the last hour gleefully searching Amazon.com for myself. The thought of using the money for others had not even crossed my mind until one of my wonderful friends asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I'm being berated with thoughts of guilt and longing. And, to be honest, the longing is almost outweighing the guilt.
I mean, do what you want to do. I think you should use the money on the gifts. Seriously, as much as it’s nice to spoil yourself, these people are always there for you, and help you out. Don’t be selfish, silly.
Anonymous asked: So here's my situation....i've always known that i was into girls but i've never told anyone and i've never really dated a girl. I just recently decided that i'm sick of handing and i wanna be more open. I really wanna date a girl but i'm having a hard time meeting people. According to my friends "i don't look like i'd be into girls". I wasn't aware that i had to look a certain way. Is this why i'm not able to meet anyone? Should i look a certain way?
I actually felt the same way when I came out. I didn’t think I looked gay enough to get girls. A lot of people go through this weird, obnoxious phase when they come out, where they have to scream out how gay they are, wear lots of rainbows and all that good stuff. Now, there is nothing wrong with that, it’s pretty normal. But, hahah, just know it’s something almost all of us regret after it’s over, hahahaa.
If you are over eighteen, a great place to go is gay clubs. Plus, don’t go looking for someone everywhere you go. Make lots of gay friends, the romance part will follow. And don’t be afraid to hit on people!
Anonymous asked: This might not be the right time to ask, I don't think you're feeling well, but I dont know what to do.
I dated my best friend for two weeks, and she just loved to party. She ended up cheating on me after reassuring me that she'd take it easy with drinking and going out and partying.
I'm hurt. She doesnt really understand. I just...feel miserable. I care so much about her, and our friendship is always so passionate.
It doesnt matter whats going on in our lives we can always talk and we've always been a little more than friends and always end up having feelings for each other. If either one of us dates someone, the other gets upset.
I love my bestfriend to death, but she's just hurt me so much.
I love her, and I don't know how to get through this.
I think it is time to take a break from her, from the friendship. I know that may be very, very hard to think of doing, but you can’t have a friendship with feelings involved, it just doesn’t work that way.
So you need to think of which is more important, the friendship, or the relationship. Either way, the two of you need a little break. She hurt you, you need to mend. If you just keep going back and back and back, your wounds will not heal, and you’ll end up resenting her. Take a breather, you’ll be alright.
That’s the thing about life, anon, no matter how bad shit gets, we all know one day we won’t even be able to recall how we felt how we feel now. Everything gets better, so, just do what you need to do to be happy, and it’ll all work out.
It always does, doesn’t it?
Anonymous asked: this is a little embarrassing, but all the same. i just got a girlfriend (my first) and i dont really know how to go down on her. any tips and things would be much appreciated.
thankyou.
Oh, this is fun!
First off, don’t be scared! Nervous is fine, but don’t be terrified! This was my very favorite first, because in the moment, I just became fearless. Kiss down her body, think about pleasing her. I am sure you know where all the right parts are and everything, just have fun with it. Suck and lick, and gauge her reaction, you will be able to tell what she likes. If she is more experienced do not be afraid to ask, “How do you like it,” “Does this feel good?” stuff like that. Just be confident in it! Circles are always good, and also, if you feel daring or up to it, put your fingers inside of her while you do it.
Anonymous asked: so, i don't know if you can really help me or not but.. i guess it just helps to know that someone will read this. sometimes i just really wish i knew what my sexuality was. i identify as straight because, well that's what's expected you know? i'm a youth leader and even though my church seems pretty open to most things, i doubt someone who's struggling with her sexuality would be one of those people. and a lot of my friends are christians. i think that's where it gets hard. because if i were to ever admit my struggles, then i risk losing them as well. but i do struggle. i have for years. i find girls attractive, more so than guys sometimes. i guess my real question is... how do i know for sure what i am? i've never been in a relationship one way or another and i'm not someone who could just jump from relationship to relationship. i just.. don't know what to do anymore.
This is a difficult thing to ask. Because some people just know, and others sort of stumble upon it. I was one of those people that had to test the waters to know for sure. Sexuality, no matter your preference, is all about exploring and testing it all out. What you like, what you’re attracted to, all those things. Maybe you’re not ready to find out just yet, but there will be a time where you can try it out, and do not be afraid of what others think of you. If they are true blue, they will stand by. And God will still love you, anyone who says different is very, very wrong.
Anonymous asked: I'm finding it difficult to get a girlfriend..I admit, I am not exactly the most attractive person and I am, should I say, chubby but anyways, I am finding it very hard to find a girlfriend :( I am 20 and been single my whole life. It's so depressing lol
You will find someone, but you have to love yourself before anyone else can love you.
Not every person basis their opinions of others on physical looks.
And guess what? Everyone is beautiful to someone.
You can’t hunt down real love, you gotta wait for that shit to come tackle your ass down.
Just be patient, have fun for right now.
Date a little bit, fuck around, just let love find you.
And make sure that when it does, you are ready for it yourself.
alexxandrathegreat-deactivated2 asked: What's the best way to tell your best friend that you love her dearly?
Buy her things.
Really, really nice things.
Or you could just cuddle with her one night a week.
And play with her hair.
Or, you could post on her advice tumblr, you creepyfuck.
You’re the best, ARam.
<3.
I’ll love you till the day I die.
Anonymous asked: Hello, I'm the anonymous who asked about what to do about my mother not accepting my bisexuality.
Thank you so much for your advice. I think at the end of the day she probably won't come around but that's the way things are.
Thank you for being level-headed and honest and for all your help.
I hope you have a super weekend :-)
I hope maybe one day she does.
And you’re very welcome.
Keep me updated, please.
My personal tumblr is sarahtheterror.tumblr.com
or you can keep me updated here.
Or AIM: sssarahlyn
Anything works :).
Anonymous asked: I've been in a relationship with a girl for about 8 months now and I really, really do like her.
Foolishly, and selfishly, I never told my parents that I was bisexual and they realised I was in a relationship when they found Valentine's Day presents and the like from her.
My mother has known for months now - since Valentine's Day - but still is completely against it and alternates from ignoring the relationship altogether, to shouting and ignoring me.
It's very upsetting and I know that my girlfriend is finding it hard too since my mother is, although not strict, very disapproving. I'm sure you know what I mean when I say that she's not banning it from happening, per se, but the repurcussions from me seeing her are just ridiculous and make home life very tense.
What do I do to try and explain to her that this isn't a "phase", that it's not my feelings that are embarrassing the family but her subsequent actions? How do I deal with this?
Thank you :-)
This is a tough one.
Being a lesbian myself, I have dealt with this on many occasions.
But never in your situation. My parents are very accepting.
So I can only see from your girlfriend’s point of view.
I wonder if she is a bisexual also.
If she is a lesbian, then I think she may be more understanding.
This is all part of being gay.
Parents disapproval, strangers disapproval, friends disapproval.
It’s common ground for almost every single homosexual out there.
If she is also bisexual, I can understand it may be a little harder for her to understand.
As for getting your mom on your side, you may never have her on your side. I have a very close friend who has literally lost a once amazing relationship with her mother all because she came out.
I think this may be one of those time can only tell kinda things, just handle it as an adult, and perhaps your mother will finally see it as that, an adult relationship.
As for the girl, bisexual or full on lesbian, if she is worth it, she’ll stick around. Explain to her you understand that this is hard, but your relationship isn’t something you are going to hide or give up on just because your mom isn’t okay with it.
Every single couple has something. It could be anything.
Yours just happens to be this.
You’ll be stronger when you come out of it, and hopefully it all works out.
I feel like this is the worst advice I’ve given, just because every single family is different. Some families will just always call your girlfriend your “friend”, some won’t let her come over, some will be accepting, some will be overly accepting and amazingly wonderful.
And in each one of those, every family is different.
All you can control is yourself, and I think you should just give it time and act adult about it.
I really hope this one works out.
Anonymous asked: im depressed. and i really think its affecting my relationship with my girlfriend. i depend on her too much and i need her too much. i dont know what to do i just want to cry. should i break it off? it might be better for her
That’s not for you to decided.
Do not ever break up with someone cause you think they would be better off without you.
If you want to break up make sure it’s because YOU want to.
Not because you THINK they want to.
As for being depressed, millions of people deal with depression-like issues every day. Maybe you should go to a therapist.
How do you think it is affecting your relationship?
